Silence

Caught in a moment of silence,
What does it mean?
Everything at that time is one,
One with the universe, one with us all.

This silence is awkward, yet so calming,
Why does someone always seem to break it?
Can't we all be one for more than a second?
I guess not, it's not meant to be, at least yet.

Why is it when I'm alone is it silent?
I know there is more than just me there,
There's spirits, I just can't see or hear them,
Maybe cause I'm not silent in my brain.

When will I be able to hear those spirits?
Can I already? I just don't recognize it,
I'm supposed to learn from this silence,
But what, is it peace and harmony?

Past silence brought me to open my eyes,
To see what's happening and learn from it,
You don't have to hear something to now it's true,
Writing that, I guess silence is truth.

If silence is truth, what is noise?
Cause there seems to be a lot of it, even in my head,
I want this silence in my life forever,
I'll have to listen for it, wait till the noise is gone.

Where Will I Go?

The rocky pit of Hell now consumes my soul,
At least for the moment. I have a hole,
In my heart, it aches inside,
It's right now that I have to decide.

To work on me being happy and loving me,
If i do this, I know I'll be set free,
Not to, I'll stay in this misery of thinking,
I don't want to be a miserable human being.

What do I see? I'm perfect in my own way,
Or be sad, and Hell is where I'll stay,
If that's what i choose, you won't see the real me,
But choosing happiness is where I'm supposed to be.

Now to explain my Hell, I'm rotting every second,
My mind, body, and soul, up for grabs is recond,
Evil in my eyes, hatred in my heart,
The true me I am no longer a part.

My Heaven is me having peace and bliss,
Every negative experience and thought I won't miss,
I'll be true to myself and others around,
My mind, body, and soul will have been found.

Where to go? It's hard to choose but not,
Heaven or Hell? In this life I've only got one shot,
It's all or nothing, either way I'll give it my all,
Stand up tall and push forward, or I'll give up and fall.

Drug Effects

Mary Jane, now this one is great,
It causes you to laugh hysterically,
Look at life positively,
Get the munchies and pig out,
Ha ha ha, look at your chinked, red eyes!

Wait, it also causes you to loose brain cells,
You can become very lazy and just sit at home,
Did you know the highest suicide rate after quitting any drug is marijuana?

Mushrooms, now these were my favorite,
Hallucinate, see anything you want to see,
Laugh or cry uncontrollably,
Feel you're one with the universe,
Think like you've never thought before.

I heard it makes your brain bleed, but that could be a lie,
Once i cracked my fingers and I thought they all broke,
Also thought stuff was in my throat and I would start to choke.

Cocaine, now this one, damn I felt good,
The rush through your body gets you goin,
Get the drips and it's back in full effect,
I was invincible, I could do anything,
Did it with a girl, and I got lucky,
If you know what I mean!

Oh my, I had a friend who had to have surgery cause her nose collapsed,
Sometimes people won't eat for days on end,
When you come down, it sucks a nut,
All you want is more and more.

Heroine this is a drug I didn't do,
I've seen people though,
They would go numb,
Feel fucking great.

I don't know what else is good,
My friend would spend 500 dollars a day,
He'd fuck over his family to get it in any way,
People lie, cheat, and steal so they can get one more fix,
My friend lost his soul,
He looked like the living dead.

Drugs have shown me a different way of life,
Is that good or bad?
I've had great times,
I'll have memories I'll never forget,
Drugs are great, they opened my mind.

Because of drugs,
I've lost thousands of dollars,
Jail was fun,
I hurt my family numerous times,
It's caused me a lot of heart ache,
Friends have died and will keep dying.

Looking at some of the effects,
Would you do drugs?

Starting Over

Everything I see reminds me of you,
Anywhere we went, anything we would do,
I ache as I go through these past memories,
All I can feel is our old energies.

Today as I awake, I pray,
Asking to see life differently I portray,
Am I capable of not living in the past?
God, help me get rid of this cast.

As I walk down the same old street,
I remember, that's where we'd meet,
Today, I feel as if I'm fine,
Usually I would whine.

That's weird, what's happening to me?
Oh wow, there's that old tree,
Together we'd sit and enjoy each other,
Look, a bird, there's one and there's another.

Aww, the movie theater,
Now it's positive emotions that occur,
Where did the negative ones go?
"Kenny, this is mine, not your show."

Oh ok, that's awesome, thanks a lot God,
"Your welcome Kenny, but this is your ballade."
So you're saying everything is my choice?
"Yes son." Hell ya! I'll be happy now, rejoice!

Now, I live in the present moment,
The smell of roses are potent,
The day is beautiful, I can breathe,
What's that? I can smile and show my teeth!

This poems to me, to help me see,
I live for myself right now, not we,
I can start over everyday,
I can be happy every single way.

I love me, I love me, I LOVE ME!

A New Life

Kenny, don't beat yourself up, you're still young,
There's plenty of fish in the sea,
What happened was for a good cause, trust me,
This is your spirit writing through you, believe.

Believe that there is a new life to be lived,
Tomorrow is a new day, you can start over,
What happened today, tomorrow it'll be done with,
So put your head up high, reach for the sky.

Your life is meant to be lived in happiness,
You're the only one who can take care of your wellness,
Leave behind the negative that's within,
Do your best everyday and you will win.

So what if you're bi-polar, your human,
Stop being a little boy and be a man,
Everyone goes through hard times, it's life,
Have faith that one day you'll find a beautiful wife.

Don't overreact to anything that goes the wrong way,
It's how God has put it in your life, ACCEPT IT,
If you do, your life will be 10 times easier,
I know you want it.

Be strong, don't give in to Satan's temptations,
I know it's hard but know you can overcome,
All it is, is that evil whisper in your head,
Be careful, that evil spirit wants you dead.

What are you going to do now Kenny?
I'm going to stop overreacting, have faith in myself,
Know that everything is in its right place,
Fight against Satan face to face.

I'll have faith in myself, do the right things,
Do my best, cause i deserve the best,
Push forward, even if it's just an inch,
I won't back down, not for anyone or anything.

Heaven can only help the ones who act,
So get up in the morning and know it's going to be a good day,
But on your boots and get to work Kenny Smith,
Life's worth living, so go for it!